Souvenirs from my Cancer ‘Adventure’ – We Need to Normalize Mental Health
When you say, “I’m seeing a physical therapist”, everyone says “great, hope you heal soon”. But when you say, “I’m seeing a therapist”, it’s typically followed by an awkward pause in the conversation and a change of subject. Why?
Taking care of your mental health should be no different than taking care of your physical health, but in our society, there is a huge chasm between the two.
The stereotypes of mental health and therapy seemed to be inextricably tied to the negative. If you face mental health challenges, you’re weak. If you see a therapist, some people might wonder if you’re crazy. You don’t even discuss mental health outside of your closest friends and family.
But with cancer there’s a flood of emotions to cope with and process.
At my oncology checkups, I’m always asked to rate my anxiety, rate my depression, but I was stunned at how reticent I was to say I was struggling. As women, we are taught from an early age that you are just expected to handle it, all of it, no matter what, to be good wives, mothers, sisters, aunts, friends, professionals.
So, I’ll confess, I needed some prodding to face the fear and the flood of other emotions. My Aunt Eileen, who is truly the mom/big sister I never had, in all the best ways, called me a few months into the ‘Adventure’ and asked me if I was talking to anyone and I told her I was fine.
She shot right back at me; “You are NOT fine. How could you possibly be fine? You are staring down Stage IV cancer in your spine, go talk to someone, please. “
And she was right. I needed to talk to someone, and I still talk to someone, as I continue to navigate this challenging reality called cancer and survivorship.
One of the strongest things you can ever do, is ask for help.
We need to normalize mental health.
Onward!
For more information on Cancer and Mental Health:
· Emotional, Mental Health, and Mood Changes, American Cancer Society (ACS)
https://www.cancer.org/treatment/treatments-and-side-effects/physical-side-effects/emotional-mood-changes.html
· How to Cope with the Impact of Cancer on Your Mental Health, American Society of Clinical Oncology (ASCO)
https://www.cancer.net/blog/2020-02/how-cope-with-impact-cancer-your-mental-health
· Physical and Mental Health Among Cancer Survivors, National Institute of Health,
https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4503227/
